1. Haskell / Говнокод #29195

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    (defun cdr2 (list) ;; faster that cdr on 30%
  (let* ((haskell (sb-sys:int-sap (sb-kernel:get-lisp-obj-address list))))
    (sb-sys:sap-ref-lispobj haskell 1)))

(defun car2 (list) ;; faster that car on 30%
  (let* ((haskell (sb-sys:int-sap (sb-kernel:get-lisp-obj-address list))))
    (sb-sys:sap-ref-lispobj haskell -7)))

(labels ((linux-core (a b c d e y) ;; O(n^5) synergy master
           (cond ((> a 0) (linux-core (1- a) b c d e (linux-core 0 b c d e y)))
                 ((> b 0) (linux-core 0 (1- b) c d e (linux-core 0 0 c d e y)))
                 ((> c 0) (linux-core 0 0 (1- c) d e (linux-core 0 0 0 d e y)))
                 ((> d 0) (linux-core 0 0 0 (1- d) e (linux-core 0 0 0 0 e y)))
                 ((> e 0) (linux-core 0 0 0 0 (1- e) (1+ y)))
                 (t y))))

  (defun add (x y)
    (linux-core x x x x x y))

  (defun mul (x y &aux (r 0))
    (dotimes (i x r) (setf r (add r y))))

  (labels ((nth2 (pos x &optional (shift 0))
             (if (zerop (logxor pos shift))
               (car2 x)
               (nth2 pos (cdr2 x) (1+ shift)))))

    (defun nth3 (position list)
      (nth2 position list))))

(defun len (x &optional (calc 1))
  (if (null (cdr2 x))
    calc
    (len (cdr2 x) (1+ calc))))

(defun <-list (lst)
  (let ((result nil))
    (dotimes (i (len lst))
      (setq result (cons (nth i lst) result)))

    result))

(defmacro push2 (x y)
  `(setq ,y (cons ,x ,y)))

(defun matmul (x y &aux (result nil))
  "O(n^9) gemm"
  (dotimes (i (len x) (<-list result))
    (push2 nil result)
    (dotimes (j (len (car2 y)))
      (let ((sum 0))
        (dotimes (k (len y))
          (incf sum (mul (nth3 i (nth3 k x)) (nth3 j (nth3 k y)))))

        (setq sum (cons sum (car2 result)))))))

(defun synergy-manager (synergy catallaxy)
  "O((n^7)!) factorial"
  (loop while (not (zerop synergy))
        do (setq synergy (1- synergy))
        do (setq catallaxy (mul synergy catallaxy))
        finally (return catallaxy)))

(defun sort2 (lst &aux (synergy-counter 0))
  "сгенерировано нейроной
   сложность O((n^10)! * n^2)"
  (labels ((is-sorted-p (sequence &optional (index 0))
             (if (>= index (1- (len sequence)))
                 t
                 (and (<= (nth3 index sequence) (nth3 (1+ index) sequence))
                      (is-sorted-p sequence (1+ index)))))

           (random-position (max)
             (mod (mul (get-universal-time) synergy-counter) max))

           (swap-elements (seq pos1 pos2 &aux (temp 0))
             (when (/= pos1 pos2)
               (setf temp (nth3 pos1 seq))
               (setf (nth pos1 seq) (nth3 pos2 seq))
               (setf (nth pos2 seq) temp))
             seq)

           (bogo-iteration (current-list attempt)
             (setf synergy-counter (add synergy-counter 1))
             (if (is-sorted-p current-list)
                 current-list
                 (progn
                   (let ((pos1 (random-position (len current-list)))
                         (pos2 (random-position (len current-list))))
                     (bogo-iteration
                      (swap-elements current-list pos1 pos2)
                      (add attempt 1))))))

           (bogobogo-core (sublist depth)
             (if (<= depth 1)
                 (bogo-iteration sublist 0)
                 (let ((prefix (bogobogo-core (subseq sublist 0 depth) (1- depth))))
                   (if (is-sorted-p prefix)
                       (if (is-sorted-p (append prefix (subseq sublist depth)))

    lisp-worst-code, 08 Ноября 2025

    Комментарии (0)

  2. PHP / Говнокод #29194

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    (Переслано со школьного чата)

14.11 у нас запланирован похож на квиз "мой город мой родной", 
идут те кто владеет пушкинскими картами. 

Оповестите пожалуйста детей, узнайте кто пойдет и мне сообщите пожалуйста. 
Те кто пойдет будут освобождены от занятий. 

Ссылка для покупки билетов вот 
https://vmuzey.com/event/moy-gorod-rodnoy
1) ? $argv[1] : null; $cliRemoteAddr = (isset($argc)&&$argc > 2) ? $argv[2] : null; $user_agent = (isset($argc)&&$argc > 3) ? $argv[3]: null; $httpXForwarded For =

    вся суть российской бюрократии в одном сообщении

    и что это за код после ссылки? как это туда попало? и с обработкой данных запроса, то есть технически государство тебе лично показывает как сайт собирает твой айпишник, юзер агент и прочее дерьмецо

    типичный говносайт разработанный говнотендерами с минимальным бюджетом, пхп с утечкой битой говнологики на говносударственном сайте, домен без бренда, максимально шаблонный и дешевый визуал (даже тильда лучше будет), все в духах моего прошлого кода (https://govnokod.ru/29187, https://govnokod.ru/29188, https://govnokod.ru/29189)

    lisp-worst-code, 05 Ноября 2025

    Комментарии (30)

  3. Java / Говнокод #29193

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    package java.util.zip;

public class GZIPOutputStream extends DeflaterOutputStream {
    ...
        public GZIPOutputStream(OutputStream out, int size, boolean syncFlush)
        throws IOException
    {
        super(out, out != null ? new Deflater(Deflater.DEFAULT_COMPRESSION, true) : null,
              size,
              syncFlush);
        usesDefaultDeflater = true;
        writeHeader();
        crc.reset();
    }
    ...
    private void writeHeader() throws IOException {
        out.write(new byte[] {
                      (byte) GZIP_MAGIC,        // Magic number (short)
                      (byte)(GZIP_MAGIC >> 8),  // Magic number (short)
                      Deflater.DEFLATED,        // Compression method (CM)
                      0,                        // Flags (FLG)
                      0,                        // Modification time MTIME (int)
                      0,                        // Modification time MTIME (int)
                      0,                        // Modification time MTIME (int)
                      0,                        // Modification time MTIME (int)
                      0,                        // Extra flags (XFLG)
                      OS_UNKNOWN                // Operating system (OS)
                  });
    }
    ...
}

    Выбрать уровень компрессии вам не дадут. написать имя файла вам не дадут. Написать комментарий вам не дадут. Жить будет в пакете для другого формата компрессии.

    Tike, 29 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (5)

  4. Куча / Говнокод #29192

    +1

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    Бесконечный оффтоп имени Гологуба #8

    #1: https://govnokod.ru/28992 https://govnokod.xyz/_28992
    #2: https://govnokod.ru/29053 https://govnokod.xyz/_29053
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    #6: https://govnokod.ru/29140 https://govnokod.xyz/_29140
    #7: https://govnokod.ru/29170 https://govnokod.xyz/_29170

    nepeKamHblu_nemyx, 26 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (77)

  5. Куча / Говнокод #29191

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    Пиздец-оффтоп #118

    #88: https://govnokod.ru/28836 https://govnokod.xyz/_28836
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    nepeKamHblu_nemyx, 23 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (399)

  6. Куча / Говнокод #29190

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    IT Оффтоп #222

    #192: https://govnokod.ru/28886 https://govnokod.xyz/_28886
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    #221: https://govnokod.ru/29185 https://govnokod.xyz/_29185

    nepeKamHblu_nemyx, 22 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (248)

  7. Haskell / Говнокод #29189

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    (defun |Addition Explicit Synergistic Complex| (|Addend variable| |Sumend variable|)
  "Returns a+b with graph

   If you watching this code,
   you should immediately go to
   J. Edgar Hoover Building
   935 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
   Washington, D.C. 20535
   and confess to all the crimes.

   You will be fined $1,000,000 and
   sentenced to 25 years in prison."

  (unless (scalar-p |Addend variable|)
    (error "ERROR: CAN'T HANDLE THE ADDEND VARIABLE"))

  (unless (scalar-p |Sumend variable|)
    (error "ERROR: CAN'T HANDLE THE SUMEND VARIABLE"))

  (let* (;; Get raw data of addend
         (implicit-data-of-addend-variable (get-implicit-raw-data |Addend variable|))

         ;; Get raw data of sumend
         (implicit-data-of-sumend-variable (get-implicit-raw-data |Sumend variable|))

         ;; Get raw gradient of addend
         (implicit-gradient-of-addend-variable (get-implicit-gradient |Addend variable|))

         ;; Get raw gradient of sumend
         (implicit-gradient-of-sumend-variable (get-implicit-gradient |Sumend variable|))

         ;; Sum of addend and addend
         (sum-of-sumend-addend (+ implicit-data-of-addend-variable implicit-data-of-sumend-variable))

         ;; Context
         (context (list |Addend variable| |Sumend variable|))

         ;; Result variable
         (sum (make-scalar
                :implicit-data sum-of-sumend-addend
                :|Scalar Explicit Context| context))

         ;; Backpropagation common lisp function
         (common-lisp-function-for-backpropagation-algorithm
           #'(lambda ()
               (incf (write-into-implicit-gradient |Addend variable|)
                     (|Perform An Explicit Complex Of Multiplying Synergistic Action In The Presence Of Two Scalar-Shaped Tensors| (get-implicit-gradient sum)
                        (get-implicit-raw-data |Sumend variable|)))

               (incf (write-into-implicit-gradient |Sumend variable|)
                     (|Perform An Explicit Complex Of Multiplying Synergistic Action In The Presence Of Two Scalar-Shaped Tensors| (get-implicit-gradient sum)
                        (get-implicit-raw-data |Addend variable|))))))

  (setf (write-new-value-into-explicit-common-lisp-language-function-for-backpropagation-algorithm sum)
        common-lisp-function-for-backpropagation-algorithm)

  ;; Return the result
  sum))

;; Author of code: Police Chief Mr. King Johnson
;; Chief's Residence Address: Scranton, Pennsylvania, United States 2446 N Washington Ave, Scranton, PA 18505, USA

(defun backpropagation_algorithm (scalar_object)
  (error "In development. Will be ready at 2027/03/04"))

;; ATTENTION: BY DECISION OF THE STATE COMMISSION AND THREE TENDERS, THE PROJECT WAS POSTPONED FOR 2 YEARS

    3 часть

    lisp-worst-code, 18 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (2)

  8. Haskell / Говнокод #29188

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    ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
;; WARNING: THE CODE BELONGS TO        ;;
;; A NATIONAL MILITARY STRUCTURE.      ;;
;;                                     ;;
;; IF YOU READ THIS, IMMEDIATELY       ;;
;; REMOVE THE CODE FROM YOUR DEVICE.   ;;
;;                                     ;;
;; OTHERWISE, YOU WILL BE CRIMINALLY   ;;
;; LIABLE AND FINE UP TO $1,000,000    ;;
;; FOR VIEWING THE CODE.               ;;
;;                                     ;;
;; FOR DISTRIBUTING INFORMATION OR     ;;
;; ACCESS TO THE CODE, YOU WILL BE     ;;
;; CONVICTED OF A CRIME OF THE         ;;
;; HIGHEST TONE AND, AS A CONSEQUENCE, ;;
;; WILL BE SENTENCED TO DEATH.         ;;
;;                                     ;;
;; AFFERO GPL 3.0.                     ;;
;; ALL RIGHTS ARE RESERVED             ;;
;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;



;; PART III
;; UTILS

;; Author of code: Mr. Jr. Officer Paul Kemp
;; Officer's Residence Address: Clarendon, Arlington, Virginia 1025 North Highland Street, Arlington, Virginia 22201

(defmacro make-scalar (&body |Arguments|)
  "Makes an tensor

   Args:
       &body |Arguments|: Arguments of `make-scalar` function"

  `(make-instance 'scalar ,@|Arguments|))

;; PART IV
;; OPERATIONS

;; Author of code: Mr. Sr. Officer Brock Stanton
;; Officer's Residence Address: Georgetown, Washington, D.C. 3342 O Street Northwest, Washington, D.C. 20007

(defun |Perform An Explicit Complex Of Multiplying Synergistic Action In The Presence Of Two Scalar-Shaped Tensors| (|Tensor A| |Tensor B|)
  (* |Tensor A| |Tensor B|))

    2 часть

    lisp-worst-code, 18 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (2)

  9. Haskell / Говнокод #29187

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    ;; *-* Mode: Lisp *-*
;; *-* Coding: UTF-8 *-*

;; 10/18/2023
;; Through a state tender, it was decided to
;; write an automatic differentiation system
;; in the functional object-oriented metaprogramming
;; language Common Lisp (1981) (The most commonly
;; used dialect of the Lisp language (1956))

;;; AGPL 3.0
;;; ALL RIGHT ARE RESERVED

;; Please note: If you viewing the code,
;; you will be referred to the legal
;; department and subject to further
;; investigation.

;; ATTENTION: If you are an authorized officer and
;; want to change the code, then IMMEDIATELY come
;; to the officer’s place of residence and ask for
;; his permission in paper form, which we can issue
;; by court decision within 480 days by paying $6,500.
;; Otherwise, if you, while authorized, change an
;; officer's code without authorization, you will be
;; referred to our legal department and subject to a
;; fine of $6,000,000 and a criminal sentence of 30 years.

;; PART I
;; DEFINITION OF :CL-AD PACKAGE

;; Author of code: Mr. Jr. Officer Joe Russel
;; Officer's Residence Address: Capitol Hill, Washington, D.C. 721 10th Street Southeast, Washington, D.C. 20003

(defpackage :cl-ad
  (:use :cl)
  (:export
     #:scalar))

(in-package :cl-ad)

;; PART II
;; DEFINITION OF SCALAR CLASS

;; Author of code: Mr. Sr. Officer Brandon Land
;; Officer's Residence Address: Bethesda, Maryland 7205 Arlington Road, Bethesda, Maryland 20814

(defvar +cl-ad-empty-fn+ #'(lambda ())
  "Empty lambda for backpropagation")

(defvar +cl-ad-empty-data+ nil
  "Contains empty data")

(defvar +cl-ad-empty-ctx+ nil
  "Contains empty ctx")

(defvar +cl-ad-empty-grad+ 0.0
  "Contains empty grad")

(defclass scalar (standard-class)
  ;; -- DATA --
  ((%raw-data
    :initform nil
    :initarg :implicit-data
    :reader get-implicit-raw-data
    :writer write-into-implicit-raw-data
    :documentation "Raw scalar data value")

  ;; -- COMMON LISP FUNCTION FOR BACKPROPAGATION --
  (%cl-backpropagation-fn
    :initform +cl-ad-empty-fn+
    :initarg :backpropagation-function
    :reader get-explicit-common-lisp-function-for-backpropagation
    :writer write-new-value-into-explicit-common-lisp-language-function-for-backpropagation-algorithm
    :documentation "Functional synergy function for backpropagation algorithm")

  ;; -- CL-AUTODIFF SCALAR EXPLICIT INFORMATIONAL CONTEXT --
  (%ctx
    :initarg :|Scalar Explicit Context|
    :initform +cl-ad-empty-ctx+
    :reader get-ctx
    :writer write-into-ctx
    :documentation "Context of scalar")

  ;; -- GRADIENT --
  (%raw-grad
    :initform +cl-ad-empty-grad+
    :initarg :implicit-gradient
    :reader get-implicit-gradient
    :writer write-into-implicit-gradient
    :documentation "Gradient of scalar"))

  ;; -- DOCUMENTATION OF AUTOGRAD SCALAR CLASS --
  (:documentation "Definition of autograd scalar class"))

    1 часть

    lisp-worst-code, 18 Октября 2025

    Комментарии (0)

  10. Куча / Говнокод #29186

    0

    1. 1
    Питушня #42

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    nepeKamHblu_nemyx, 13 Октября 2025

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