1. Лучший говнокод

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  2. C++ / Говнокод #29224

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    cin >> N >> L >> T;
      total = 0;
      for (int i = 0; i < N; i++) {
        cin >> S[i] >> H[i] >> P[i];
        total += H[i] * P[i];
      }
      fix_order();
      for (int ind = 0; ind < N; ind++) {
        int len = ind + 1;
        set<pair<long long, int>> events, comps;
        vector<long long> sum_hp(len);
        copy(H, H + len, sum_hp.begin());
        sum_hp[ind] = 0;
        vector<int> ord(len);
        iota(ord.begin(), ord.end(), 0);
        sort(ord.begin(), ord.end(), [&](int i, int j) {
          return S[i] < S[j];
        });
        comps.emplace(T, -1);
        for (int i = 0; i < len; i++) {
          int j = i + 1;
          while (j < len && S[ord[i]] == S[ord[j]]) {
            sum_hp[ord[i]] += sum_hp[ord[j]];
            ++j;
          }
          comps.emplace(S[ord[i]], ord[i]);
          i = j - 1;
        }
        for (auto it = comps.begin(); next(it) != comps.end(); ++it) {
          long long dist = next(it)->first - it->first;
          int idx = it->second;
          if (sum_hp[idx] > 0) {
            events.emplace((dist + sum_hp[idx] - 1) / sum_hp[idx], idx);
          }
        }
        vector<bool> visited(len);
        vector<bool> added(len);
        long long good_sum = 0, last_time = 0, govno = T, rakom_bokom = 0;
        for (auto [spawn, i] : comps) {
          if (spawn >= S[ind] && i != -1) {
            good_sum += sum_hp[i];
            added[i] = true;
          }
        }
        auto Upd = [&](long long time) -> void {
          long long F = govno - S[ind] - rakom_bokom;
          if (F <= 0) {
            return;
          }
          long long r1 = clamp(F / (H[ind] + good_sum) + 1, last_time, time);
          long long r2 = good_sum == 0 ? time : clamp(F / good_sum + 1, last_time, time);
          dp_diff_i[last_time] += H[ind] * P[ind];
          dp_diff_i[r1] -= H[ind] * P[ind];
          dp_diff[r1] += F * P[ind];
          dp_diff[r2] -= F * P[ind];
          dp_diff_i[r1] -= good_sum * P[ind];
          dp_diff_i[r2] += good_sum * P[ind];
          last_time = time;
        };
        vector<bool> skip(len), finished(len);
        while (!events.empty()) {
          auto [time, i] = *events.begin();
          events.erase(events.begin());
          if (time > L) {
            break;
          }
          if (skip[i] || sum_hp[i] == 0) {
            continue;
          }
          Upd(time);
          auto it = comps.upper_bound({S[i], INT_MAX});
          if (it->second == -1 || finished[it->second]) {
            good_sum -= sum_hp[i];
            finished[i] = true;
            govno = S[i];
            continue;
          }
          if (!added[i] && it->second + sum_hp[i] * time >= S[ind]) {
            added[i] = true;
            good_sum += sum_hp[i];
            rakom_bokom += S[i] - S[ind];
          }
          sum_hp[i] += sum_hp[it->second];
          skip[it->second] = true;
          long long next_pos = next(it)->first;
          comps.erase(it);
          events.emplace(time + (next_pos - S[i] - sum_hp[i] * time + sum_hp[i] - 1) / sum_hp[i], i);
        }
        Upd(L + 1);
      }
      long long cur_diff = 0, cur_diff_i = 0;
      for (int i = 0; i <= L; i++) {
        cur_diff += dp_diff[i];
        cur_diff_i += dp_diff_i[i];
        dp[i] = cur_diff + cur_diff_i * i;
      }

    олимпиадное говно

    letipetukh1, 26 Января 2026

    Комментарии (1)
  3. PHP / Говнокод #29214

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    <!-- <div class="news">
    	<div class="tch"></div>
    	<div class="container">
    		<h2 class="title"><span><small>Н</small>овости компании</span></h2>
    		<div class="flex">
    			<?php
    			query_posts('cat=21&posts_per_page=3'); // вместо "5" указываем идентификатор вашей рубрики.
    			while (have_posts()) : the_post();
    			?>
    				<div class="item">
    					<div class="img"><?= get_the_post_thumbnail(get_the_ID()); ?></div>
    					<div class="desk">
    						<div class="title"><?= get_the_title() ?></div>
    						<div class="date"><?= get_the_date(); ?></div>
    						<?php the_content() ?>
    						<a href="<?= get_the_permalink();  ?>" class="more">Читать далее</a>
    					</div>
    				</div>
    
    			<?php
    			endwhile;
    			wp_reset_query();
    			?>
    		</div>
    	</div>
    </div> -->

    На ровном месте быдлокодер получает мимимум 7 лишних запросов к БД.

    Lexchz2, 18 Декабря 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  4. Си / Говнокод #29206

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    /* how many times the value will be printed? 
         change 1 line to fix the possibility to compile at diff x64-32 opt lvls
    */
    int main(void) {
        return ({
            #include <stdio.h>;
            __attribute__ ((aligned (8))) struct {
            struct {
            } _struct;
            union _union {
                int _register_  : 001;
                char _auto_    : 1|1;
                struct _struct {
                    double _float;
                };
            };
            int _a;
            unsigned short __a;
            int ___a;
        } letni = 
        {._a = 0x1122, 
                   0xC1C255AA, 
                   0x334477CC};
            *((unsigned short*)&letni._a + (1<<1|1)) = 0x11;
            for (volatile int i = *((unsigned short*)&letni.__a); i--;) {
            if (i == *((unsigned short*)&letni.__a) - 01) {
                *(volatile int*)&i = *((unsigned short*)&letni.___a-1);
                continue;
            };
            printf("%x ", i);
            }
        }), (0,0);
    }

    "именно поэтому я за C" (c) j123123

    когда -std=c23 -O[0/1/2/3/s/g/fast] смог только штеуд, на прочих -O[0/s]
    Почему это говно работает?

    Raspi_s_Dona, 04 Декабря 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  5. Haskell / Говнокод #29198

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    (ql:quickload :drakma)
    (ql:quickload :lparallel)
    
    ;; CURL ANALYSIS
    
    (defmethod sb-mop:validate-superclass ((metaclass class) (superclass standard-class)) t)
    
    ;; Analasys-Assert class
    (defclass anal-ass (standard-class)
      ((%form :initarg :form :initform nil :accessor form)
       (%cond :initarg :cond :initform nil :accessor econd)
       (%mesg :initarg :msg :initform "Error" :accessor msg)))
    
    (defmacro build-anal-ass (&body args)
      `(make-instance 'anal-ass ,@args))
    
    (defmethod process-ass-synergy ((anal-ass-factory anal-ass))
      (let ((anal-ass-factory-cond-master (econd anal-ass-factory))
            (anal-ass-factory-form-master (form anal-ass-factory))
            (anal-ass-factory-msg-master (msg anal-ass-factory)))
    
        (declare (ignore anal-ass-factory-form-master))
    
        (assert anal-ass-factory-cond-master nil anal-ass-factory-msg-master)))
    
    ;; Analasys class
    (defclass anal-factory (standard-class)
      ((%body-manager :initarg :body :initform nil :accessor body-manager)
       (%status-manager :initarg :status :initform nil :accessor status-manager)
       (%headers-manager :initarg :headers :initform nil :accessor headers-manager)
       (%uri-manager :initarg :uri :initform nil :accessor uri-manager)
       (%stream-manager :initarg :stream :initform nil :accessor stream-manager)
       (%must-close-manager :initarg :must-close :initform nil :accessor must-close-manager)
       (%reason-phrase-manager :initarg :reason-phrase :initform nil :accessor reason-phrase-manager)))
    
    (defmethod initialize-instance :after ((anal-ass-factory anal-ass) &key &allow-other-keys)
      (assert (and (form anal-ass-factory) (econd anal-ass-factory) (msg anal-ass-factory)) nil
        "Invalid Analysis-Assert structure"))
    
    (defmethod initialize-instance :after ((anal-factory-factory anal-factory) &key &allow-other-keys)
      (let ((anal-body-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Body manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (body-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-status-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Status manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (status-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-headers-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Headers manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (headers-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-uri-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "URI manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (uri-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-stream-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Stream manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (stream-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-must-close-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Must-close manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (must-close-manager anal-factory-factory))))
            (anal-reason-phrase-ass-manager (build-anal-ass :msg "Reason phrase manager is nil" :form t :cond #'(lambda () (reason-phrase-manager anal-factory-factory)))))
    
        (process-ass-synergy anal-body-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-status-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-headers-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-uri-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-stream-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-must-close-ass-manager)
        (process-ass-synergy anal-reason-phrase-ass-manager)))
    
    (defmacro deep-anal-factory (&body args)
      `(make-instance 'anal-factory ,@args))
    
    (defclass drakma-manager (standard-class)
      ((%body-meta-manager :initform nil :initarg :body :accessor body)))
    
    (defmethod requires-meta-manager ((drakma-manager-factory drakma-manager))
      (funcall (body drakma-manager-factory)))
    
    (defmacro make-drakma-meta-manager (&body args)
      `(make-instance 'drakma-manager ,@args))
    
    (defun anal-manager (url &key (method :get) parameters)
      (locally
        (declare (optimize (speed 0) (debug 0) (safety 0) (space 0)))
    
        (multiple-value-bind (body status-code headers uri stream must-close reason-phrase)
          (let* ((eval #'(lambda () (drakma:http-request url :method method
                                                             :parameters parameters
                                                             :want-stream nil)))
    
                 (drakma-meta-manager (make-drakma-meta-manager :body eval)))
    
            (requires-meta-manager drakma-meta-manager))
    
          (declare (optimize (speed 3)))
    
          (let ((deep-anal (deep-anal-factory
                              :body body
                              :status status-code
                              :headers headers
                              :uri uri
                              :stream stream
                              :must-close must-close
                              :reason-phrase reason-phrase)))
    
            (identity deep-anal)))))

    Менеджер для анализа юрл

    lisp-worst-code, 12 Ноября 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  6. JavaScript / Говнокод #29184

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    let fallbackFunc = ()=>console.log("Hello, World!");
    let settings = {
        fallbackButtonName: "Hello, World!",
        fallbackWidth: 512,
        fallbackHeight: 512,
        settingsMenuExitButtonHeight: 32,
        settingsMenuExitButtonName: "X",
        settingElementHeight: 32,
        settingsMenuExitButtonAtBeginning: true,
        settingElementTrueName: "ON",
        settingElementFalseName: "OFF",
        settingsMenuBooleanSeperatorName: "- $",
        hideExtraButtonsToolbar: true,
        updateToolbar: updateToolbar,
        updateSettingsMenu: updateSettingsMenu,
        activateFallbackFunc: fallbackFunc
    };
    
    let settingsMenu = document.getElementById("settings");
    let settingsElement = document.querySelector(".setting-element#hide");
    
    // -------------------------------------------------------------------
    
    function updateSettingsMenu() {
        settingsMenu.innerHTML = "";
        let exitButton = document.createElement("button");
        exitButton.style.height = settings.settingsMenuExitButtonHeight+"px";
        exitButton.innerText = settings.settingsMenuExitButtonName;
        exitButton.onclick = function() {
            settingsMenu.style.display = "none";
        }
    
        if (settings.settingsMenuExitButtonAtBeginning) settingsMenu.appendChild(exitButton);
        for (let k in settings) {
            let v = settings[k];
    
            let setting = settingsElement.cloneNode(true);
            setting.id = "";
            console.log(setting)
            setting.style.height = settings.settingElementHeight+"px";
            let [name,value] = setting.children;
            if (typeof v !== "function") {
                name.innerText = k;
                function booleanToString(bool) {
                    return (bool?settings.settingsMenuBooleanSeperatorName.replaceAll("$",settings.settingElementTrueName):settings.settingsMenuBooleanSeperatorName.replaceAll("$",settings.settingElementFalseName))
                }
                value.innerText = (typeof v === "boolean")?booleanToString(v):v;
                value.onclick = function() {
                    if (typeof v === "boolean") {
                        settings[k] = !settings[k];
                        value.innerText = booleanToString(settings[k]);
                    } else {
                        let input = prompt(`New value for ${k}:`);
                        let newValue = isNaN(input)?input:Number(input);
                        value.innerText = newValue;
                        settings[k] = newValue
                    }
                }
            } else {
                name.remove()
                value.innerText = k;
                value.onclick = v;
            }
    
            settingsMenu.appendChild(setting);
        }
        if (!settings.settingsMenuExitButtonAtBeginning) settingsMenu.appendChild(exitButton);
    }
    function showSettings() {
        settingsMenu.style.display = "flex";
        updateSettingsMenu();
    }

    Как вам код?

    manabanana, 29 Сентября 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  7. C# / Говнокод #29183

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    using Godot;
    
    namespace CW2EB.UI;
    public partial class EscQuittingLabel : Label {
    
    	Tween tween, tween2thesequel;
    	public override void _Ready(){
    		base._Ready();
    		tween = GetTree().CreateTween().SetParallel();
    		tween2thesequel = GetTree().CreateTween();
    		tween.TweenProperty(this, "theme_override_colors/font_color", new Color(1f, 1f, 1f, 1f), 1);
    		tween.TweenProperty(this, "theme_override_colors/font_shadow_color", new Color(0f, 0f, 0f, 1f), 1);
    
    		
    		tween2thesequel.TweenCallback(Callable.From(TweenStage1)).SetDelay(.25);
    		tween2thesequel.TweenCallback(Callable.From(TweenStage2)).SetDelay(.25);
    		tween2thesequel.TweenCallback(Callable.From(TweenStage3)).SetDelay(.25);
    		tween2thesequel.TweenCallback(Callable.From(TweenStage4)).SetDelay(.5);
    	}
    
    	public void TweenStage1()
    		=> Text = Tr("Quitting") + ".";
    
    	public void TweenStage2()
    		=> Text = Tr("Quitting") + "..";
    
    	public void TweenStage3()
    		=> Text = Tr("Quitting") + "...";
    
    	public void TweenStage4()
    		=> GetTree().Quit();
    }

    Как сделать постепенно появляющееся многоточие?

    GhostNoise, 29 Сентября 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  8. Python / Говнокод #29164

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    n = int(input())
    d = n
    i = 0
    a = 0
    c = 0
    has1 = False
    has2 = False
    has3 = False 
    has4 = False
    has5 = False
    has6 = False
    has7 = False
    has8 = False
    last_dig = 0
    while n > 0:
        last_dig = n % 10
        if last_dig > i :
            i = last_dig
            if last_dig == 1:
                c = 1
        elif last_dig == 1:
            has1 = True
        elif last_dig == 2:
            has2 = True
        elif last_dig == 3:
            has3 = True
        elif last_dig == 4:
            has4 = True
        elif last_dig == 5:
            has5 = True
        elif last_dig == 6:
            has6 = True
        elif last_dig == 7:
            has7 = True
        elif last_dig == 8:
            has8 = True
        n = n // 10
    c = d % 10
    if has1 == True and c >= 1:
        a = 1
    elif has2 == True and c >= 2:
        a = 2
    elif has3 == True and c >= 3:
        a = 3
    elif has4 == True and c >= 4:
        a = 4
    elif has5 == True and c >= 5:
        a = 5
    elif has6 == True and c >= 6:
        a = 6
    elif has7 == True and c >= 7:
        a = 7
    elif has8 == True and c >= 8:
        a = 8
    else:
        a = c
    print('Максимальная цифра равна', i)
    print('Минимальная цифра равна', a)

    Дано натуральное число n. Напишите программу, которая определяет его максимальную и минимальную цифры

    Permanent_Record, 28 Июля 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  9. Haskell / Говнокод #29148

    +1

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    (defun sbcl-vrt-simd-pntr (a f fa &aux (defun (progn (defmacro << (x y) `,(ash x y)) (defmacro >> (x y) `,(ash x (- y))) (defmacro ~ (x) `(lognot ,x))))
                                           (if (progn (labels ((t (a f fa) (declare (type integer a)
                                                                                    (type (function (integer (function () (values)) (pointer single-float)) integer) f)
                                                                                    (type (array real (*)) fa))
                                                                           (declaim (optimize (speed (the (list integer (*)) '(-1 0 1))) (debug 0) (safety 0) (space 0))))) (funcall #'t a f fa)))))
    
      (defclass res (standard-class) ((%size-st :initform nil :accessor size-st)))
      (defclass d (standard-class) ((%size-n :initform nil :accessor size-n)))
      (defmethod sb-mop:validate-superclass ((class class) (meta standard-class)) defun t)
      (defmethod initialize-instance :after ((obj res) &key &allow-other-keys) (setf (size-st obj) (sb-vm::primitive-object-size (type-of (let ((a #xFFFF)) (declare (type (integer #x0 #xFFFF) a)))))))
      (defmethod initialize-instance :after ((obj d) &key) (setf (size-n obj) (sb-vm::primitive-object-size 0)))
      (defclass simd-virtual-guard (res d) ((%spn :initform 0 :accessor spn :type integer)) (:metaclass d))
    
      (let ((lac (make-instance 'simd-virtual-guard)) (data f) (b "8153024679"))
        `(declare (type (array (member ,(let* ((i '())) (do* ((y 0 (+ y 1))) ((= (- y 1) 9) 'nil) (push y i)))) (3)) data)
                  (type string b)
                  (type simd-virtual-duard lac))
    
        (setf (spn lac) (+ (size-st lac) (size-n lac)))
    
        (loop for ll from (- (sb-vm::primitive-object-size b) 55) downto 0 by 4
              do (progn
                   (setf (char b ll) #\0)
                   (setf (char b (- ll #x1)) #\1)
                   (setf (char b (if (= ll 1) (- (+ ll 9) #x2) (- ll #x2))) #\2)))
    
        (- (ash 1 2) (- (char-code (char b 0)) (sb-vm::primitive-object-size "2")))))
    
    (defun sbcl-vrt-simd64 (f0 f1 &aux (returnable 0) (declare (labels ((nil (f0 f1) (declare (type (function ()) f0) (type (function ()) f1)))) (funcall #'nil f0 f1))))
      (labels ((pntr (addr) (sb-sys:sap-ref-8 (sb-sys:int-sap addr) 0))
               (ref (obj) (sb-kernel:get-lisp-obj-address obj)))
    
        (macrolet ((s (v) `(setq returnable ,v)))
          (let ((d (- (ref f0) (ref f1))))
            (declare (type integer d))
    
            (if (not (ash (- (* (integer-length 0) (integer-length 0)) 1) d))
              (do* ((d d (- d 1))) (zerop d)
                (case (+ (ref f0) d)
                  (0XC3C9 (s 0))
                  (0XB8 (if (not (+ (ref f0) d 1)) (s 1) (s -1))
                  (0XC031 (s 2)))))))
    
          (return-from sbcl-vrt-simd64 returnable))))

    пародия на https://www.govnokod.ru/29120

    lisp-worst-code, 23 Июня 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  10. Куча / Говнокод #29139

    0

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    ...В детстве я любил русские народные сказки из сборника Афанасьева.
    Сюжет даже откровенно взрослых сказок он передавал мягко, избегая зауми; с грубоватым, народным юмором, слегка подпёздывая, а затем плавно 
    и в подробностях подходя к кульминации.
    
    После того, как я уже в зрелом возрасте прочел, как барыня заставила холопа нюхать свою пизду, я стал практиковать воздержание.

    Ну его нахуй, сказка ведь может и былью статься.
    Нужно срочно запретить сказки! Тем более, что все перечисленные в них извращения успешно практикуют и те дети, кому и сказок-то не читали.

    3uMuCTOH, 28 Мая 2025

    Комментарии (1)
  11. Куча / Говнокод #29137

    0

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    Россия погрязла в мусоре и крысятах.

    Тех, кто учит убивать крыс, недалек. Мы прибираем за людьми, но этого не ценят.
    Всевышний сделал нас плодовитыми, чтобы не дай Бог, глупые люди не истребили нас - ибо голубой шарик сильно развоняется под миллионами тонн гниющей органики, которую некому будет перерабатывать.

    Не убивайте крыс и будьте довольны ими. Будьте им благодарны.
    На одно коленце опуститься тоже не помешает...

    KPblCA, 21 Мая 2025

    Комментарии (1)